My Diary


March 28th, 2024


Uh, hi. this isn't something i usually do, but the doctor says i should keep a diary, just so i have something to refer back too for my missing hand. god its hard to type on a phone keyboard with 1 hand, especially since its my non-dominate hand, well i guess it's my dominate hand now huh? haha
i don't know what to think about that rom, i know this is just supposed to be about the missing hand but fuck man how am i not supposed to think of... THAT! what is it?? why can it hear me?? how did it get my face?...why do i want to help it.


April 1st, 2024


my hand grew back! haha april fools!... too me, i guess? i ate some waffles, i really wanna get back to doing art, though... i'm scared its not gonna be the same with one hand.
it feels... so weird, i keep thinking i still have my hand, and i feel so empty thinking about it.
i didn't tell the doctor or my roommate about the rom, i just told the doctor i woke up with my hand that way. it doesn't feel real to me,so why would it feel real to them?
i don't know, ive been trying not to think about it.
lump


April 15th, 2024


i've been too scared to turn my computer back on, i mean, do you blame me?? well i mean, i'm not talking to anybody right now so i guess you physically CAN'T blame me. there's not even a you, it's just me.
...do you think he feels lonely? i mean it. the thing in my computer. it... seemed to enjoy my company in his own weird way. and it didnt feel like "oooo haha im so evil so i love you because i get to torture you!!!" like these kinds of stories go... it seemed... genuine. like he really does like when im around.
well if he did, why did he rot my damn hand off??


April 21st, 2024


OW OW Gh fffffpajhrny hanfbf hurts alot for tsokm e reasopn fgufk cunt fukc
FUCK that hurt, i just felt like my hand was still there and it fuckin hurt, i think the doctor said something about that, like... it was called fuckin'... phantom menace? or some bull like that idk im goin to bed.

April 22nd, 2024


PHANTOM PAIN! thats what it was, phantom menace is the star wars film. ya know, i thought it was alright okay? there i said it i liked it it was a fun movie.
oh yea, i took a selfie when i woke up. at least im sleeping alright.
selfei


April 30th, 2024


i can't stop thinking about it, the rom i mean. its kinda hard too forget. i... i almost envy him. he seems so... carefree. despite rotting away, despite dying, despite being alone for so long... he still keeps up a smile, always looking on the bright side.
...did he even mean to take my hand?
i don't know.